?

Log in

No account? Create an account

When you move your feet, pray

« previous entry | next entry »
Oct. 18th, 2011 | 11:44 am

(I'm participating in a writing contest. This is my first entry)




Here is what I think about God.
 
I think He is darn convenient when I am driving in the rain, my fingers gripping the wheel as if they can make my tires grip the road at 2AM, I should have stopped in Syracuse, two more hours of wet slick darkness until bed.
 
I think He is absent-minded when I round the corner of Ramstore, walking past industry and dirt and buses and then down shaded promenades lined with tourist-coffee and tourist-salad and the outpost of TGI Fridays at the corner of Mito Hadzivasilev and Boulevard Kocho Racin, but first walking past the Rom girl, all of six or maybe a small eight, tugging up her pants after squatting and shitting, running to me with her hand held out.
 
I think He is ineffable when I peer through the secret door arching Lake Constanz, the water black, the sky black, stars not yet out, darkness cradling me like a womb, so close, so terrifying, so enormous to step down the iron stair.
 
I meet Him in the secret church off the Kalverstraat. In Thorncrown Chapel. At La Iglesia. In Notre Dame, of course; but also in the mosquito-clouded prairie between Lloydminster and Saskatoon, the dirt of Skopje, the long sand ripples outside Al Ain.
 
He says, keep moving.
 
I point out, there are a number of people quietly sitting, quietly tithing, quietly going home, sleeping each night on the same pillow, rolling over into the same wide hips of their same lover, waking to the sun in each other’s faces in a place that is home.
 
He says, keep moving.
 
I move. I move. Sometimes I run, sometimes I chase, sometimes my grasp comes near my reach, sometimes I stagger in the dark, afraid to take the first metal grated step over water. And still I move.
 
Step. Drive. Run. Pray.




Whipchick has known clauderains since freshman year of high school. They were equally dorky. They still are.
Tags: ,

Link | Leave a comment | Share

Comments {179}

Page 1 of 6
<<[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] >>

Patricia Braverman-Knope

(no subject)

from: rhetoricians
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 03:47 pm (UTC)
Link

This is gorgeous. The imagery is simply divine!

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:23 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you very much! It's so wonderful to have an excuse to write, which makes me wonder why I feel like i need an excuse :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

Tonia

(no subject)

from: pricelessone
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 03:48 pm (UTC)
Link

Love the feeling in this. Great first entry.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:26 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you! Can't wait to read you, too :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

Thellie

(no subject)

from: malruniel11
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 03:56 pm (UTC)
Link

You're giving me itchy feet! Wander lust powers activate!

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:23 pm (UTC)
Link

Yay!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Raoul Duke

(no subject)

from: drjeff
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:09 pm (UTC)
Link

I love the rhythm in this. I'm looking forward to reading more of your work!

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:24 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you - I'm so pleased to get to join in! Also, loved your comment on your own page about "FIRST WORLD PROBLEM" - I've found myself in a lot of airports lately saying, "Waahhh! My flight's delayed! I'm white and rich and can go anywhere I want, my life is SO HARD, waahhhh!"

Edited at 2011-10-18 04:26 pm (UTC)

Reply | Parent | Thread

m_malcontent

(no subject)

from: m_malcontent
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:40 pm (UTC)
Link

Has a unique feel in style and pace, enjoyed.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:47 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

Hejira

(no subject)

from: ____hejira
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 04:47 pm (UTC)
Link

I read this 3 times. I love your rich, long sentences. Beautiful.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:47 pm (UTC)
Link

What a great compliment - thank you.

Reply | Parent | Thread

Jennie

(no subject)

from: teenagewitch
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 05:59 pm (UTC)
Link

I loved it, it was awesome and very moving.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:47 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Yelizaveta

(no subject)

from: majesticarky
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 06:13 pm (UTC)
Link

Very thoughtful. I like that. Also nice bit of history. I like knowing things like this!

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 19th, 2011 06:13 am (UTC)
Link

One of my favorite parts of writing is research! The secret church in Kalverstraat is amazing - it's a main shopping street in Amsterdam, very glassy and retail, and then there's a pair of wooden doors tucked between a shoe store and a Top Shop, and inside it's a different world - a quite large church that isn't visible from the street at all, because there was a time in Dutch history when it wasn't safe to be Catholic, followed by a time when it was OK as long as you decently hid it.

Reply | Parent | Thread

A hero to the judgment-impaired everywhere

(no subject)

from: tralfamadore
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 06:31 pm (UTC)
Link

Wow. Right out of the gates, first entry of the season is of this caliber. It reminds me of why I wanted so badly to join back up with this, and makes me eager to read everything that is to come. I think you did a fantastic job balancing the topic at hand with the knowledge that this is your first introduction to many of us. Right now I just want to know more and read more of what you have to share. It's an extremely rich, extremely vivid entry and I can't wait to read more.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:48 pm (UTC)
Link

Thanks - I feel really welcomed and I'm so eager to see what everyone else writes - what a terrific and positive community this is!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Maerhys

(no subject)

from: maerhys
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:05 pm (UTC)
Link

I meet Him in the secret church off the Kalverstraat. In Thorncrown Chapel. At La Iglesia. In Notre Dame, of course; but also in the mosquito-clouded prairie between Lloydminster and Saskatoon, the dirt of Skopje, the long sand ripples outside Al Ain.

Gorgeous imagery. I feel like I am right there, peering in at these places. Lovely work.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:48 pm (UTC)
Link

Thanks - I'm really fucking impressed by yours, you make me want to step up my game.

Reply | Parent | Thread

Norda Maranda Coy

(no subject)

from: n_maranda_coy
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:47 pm (UTC)
Link

Simply incredible! Fabulous first entry.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 07:49 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

Gardening at Night

(no subject)

from: cacophonesque
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 10:08 pm (UTC)
Link

I love the poetry of your prose as well as the way that you explore the different facets of god. This is a really standout entry to start things off. You've managed to write to the topic while also displaying a unique voice and introduction to your writing.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 19th, 2011 04:27 am (UTC)
Link

Thank you - it's an honor to be so welcomed by people with more experience here!

Reply | Parent | Thread

similiesslip

Powerful

from: similiesslip
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 10:56 pm (UTC)
Link

Very powerful. I struggle with beliefs. I do feel there is a Higher Power but it's hard (for me) to understand how much He is or is not involved in our lives, when some have so much and some have so little.

Those last 4 words express so much.

Your entry is so amazing AND you wrote it so fast. I can't wait to see what you write next!

Reply | Thread

whipchick

Re: Powerful

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 19th, 2011 06:14 am (UTC)
Link

Thanks - I happened to be online when the topic was posted, and it inspired me!

It is hard - especially traveling in third world and second world countries - to continue to believe in a just God. I'm a little bit Buddhist, and that helps, but sometimes I end up thinking that it's like a play in which I am an character - "I don't understand why that's happening to that person - but I'm not supposed to understand, it's not my scene." I'm not sure if that's a cop-out.

Reply | Parent | Thread

Shadow Wolf Byrd

(no subject)

from: shadowwolf13
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 11:37 pm (UTC)
Link

That urge to move, to experience, is something that can't be ignored. Great entry. :D

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 19th, 2011 06:14 am (UTC)
Link

Thank you :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

IndigoTCG

(no subject)

from: indigotcg
date: Oct. 18th, 2011 11:41 pm (UTC)
Link

I love the pace here, the imagery, all the little details. There's something quiet and haunting but driven. Very lovely.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Oct. 19th, 2011 06:15 am (UTC)
Link

Thank you! I felt driven as I was writing, and I'm glad that came through for you.

Reply | Parent | Thread