?

Log in

No account? Create an account

International Relations: Whipchick-Style

« previous entry | next entry »
Feb. 19th, 2013 | 04:41 pm

In Eastern Europe, there are little pastries called Fornetti. You buy them in a shop, or at stalls at festivals, and you buy them by weight. They come out of the oven every few minutes on big trays, little hot pockets of chocolate or apricot or pizza-sauce or sausage in crispy layers of filo-dough, and the shopkeeper scoops up however many you want, weighs the paper bag, and you head out into the street with your piping-hot Fornetti and a sense of blissful contentment.

Mostly, we ate them at night, in Skopje, Macedonia when we were done doing trapeze shows, my partners getting 40-cent beers while I picked up the Fornetti. But we also ate them in Budva, Montengro when the beach bars closed, at a rest stop in Albania while our bus driver grumbled at the wait until we gave him a handful, and in Belgrade, Serbia, near buildings still bombed-out shells from the Bosnian war with signs posted in Serbian: REMEMBER WHAT THE AMERICANS DID TO US.

In Sibenik, Croatia, the Fornetti shop closed early, 9PM. It was worth it to pick some up before the last show and eat them lukewarm afterwards.

I don't read Croatian. Or speak it particularly well. I've got Please and Thank You and That Was Our Show We Love Your Country Now Please Put Money In The Hat. So when I buy Fornetti, I have to see the trays in the glass bakery case and point, so I can make sure not to get the meat ones--my trapeze duet partner is seriously vegetarian.

I'm in Fornetti, it's pretty crowded, I have ten minutes before the show starts, and a pair of eight, nine-year-old boys, just at the obnoxious age, are leaning their whole bodies on the front of the case. They're not choosing Fornetti, they're just leaning on it and sliding around. And I say "excuse me" and "please" in Croatian and English, and they are just not having any of it.

So I calculate my angle, and then I look intently out the shop window, like I'm waiting for my friend. And I give the kid nearest me a sharp kick in the ankle. He looks at me--I'm still looking out the window, innocent tourist--and immediately hauls off and socks his friend in the shoulder. The two kids start fighting, their mom hauls them out of the shop still kicking and screaming.

The shopkeeper looks at me, and we both shrug and make a sad noise about how badly-behaved kids are today, what can you do? and I point and buy a half-kilo mixed of cheese, chocolate, and apricot.

They were delicious.



_________________________________________________

Link | Leave a comment | Share

Comments {18}

(no subject)

from: faerie_spark
date: Feb. 19th, 2013 10:24 pm (UTC)
Link

*chuckling*

Those sound delicious! I would brave the pain afterwards 9I have a gluten or wheat intolerance, not sure which) to eat those after reading how you describe them.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:00 pm (UTC)
Link

They are so delicious! And greasy enough that I can only feel OK eating them if I've had a physical work day :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

Sally

(no subject)

from: i_smell_apples
date: Feb. 19th, 2013 11:36 pm (UTC)
Link

I know I never comment, so this is kind of a dozen posts in one all-encompassing comment to say OMG I just love reading your entries, I wish they were part of a pretty, gold-edged leather-bound book that I could sit under a tree and read instead of just on my computer screen, because damn you have the BEST STORIES EVER and I am envious :D I want to go to all the fabulous places and eat pastries and kick small children.

Also I can count to ten in Croatian! I was bored one day and hanging out at the gf's work for her last hour (2nd-hand bookstore) and there was a teach yourself Croatian book, so I did.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:01 pm (UTC)
Link

Thank you thank you thank you!

I think I need to be working towards publishing a book of travel essays :)

What i love about Croatian is that it and Serbian and Montenegran are basically the same language with different accents, and each country insists that it has its own language because they all dislike each other so much!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Andrea Blythe

(no subject)

from: blythe025
date: Feb. 19th, 2013 11:59 pm (UTC)
Link

LOL! Anything for a Fornetti, huh. I must have one.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:01 pm (UTC)
Link

They are so yummy :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

Vice Captain of the Universe

(no subject)

from: sweeny_todd
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 12:51 am (UTC)
Link

oh that sounds delicious!!
teeheee... worth a fight, huh? ^_^

(I would totally try the meat ones too!!)

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:02 pm (UTC)
Link

The meat ones are also tasty, I just had to get them in a separate bag!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Cos

(no subject)

from: cos
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 12:57 am (UTC)
Link

Are these Fornetti endemic to the Balkans? Or are they all over the rest of central and eastern Europe?

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:02 pm (UTC)
Link

I've only seen them in Macedonia, Croatia and Montenegro, but that doesn't mean they aren't other places. The stalls and shops are always blue and orange with a race car theme!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Epiphanyrun

(no subject)

from: epiphanyrun
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 01:35 am (UTC)
Link

That was a cute story. Thanks for sharing it with us!

Reply | Thread

Fornetti

from: anonymous
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 04:39 am (UTC)
Link

Great story, reminds me of a certain trapeze artist who could be on either side of that story. Keep writing. Until next time..remember....Fall down seven times...Stand up Eight. Harvey

Reply | Thread

whipchick

Re: Fornetti

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:03 pm (UTC)
Link

So glad you liked it, thanks, Harvey!

Reply | Parent | Thread

Laura, aka "Ro Arwen"

(no subject)

from: roina_arwen
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 05:42 am (UTC)
Link

Well, I guess now we know "What will you do for a Fornetti bar?" :)

Reply | Thread

whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:03 pm (UTC)
Link

LOL :)

Reply | Parent | Thread

The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors

(no subject)

from: halfshellvenus
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 06:01 pm (UTC)
Link

Hahaha! You've developed a new area of evil!

Though for chocolate pastry, it's probably worth it. :D

Reply | Thread

drwex

It used to be

from: drwex
date: Feb. 20th, 2013 06:24 pm (UTC)
Link

...that you could get fornetti in the North End bakeries in Boston. Or at least a couple of them. I haven't been there in many years, so I don't know if it's true any longer. But they were good.

Reply | Thread

whipchick

Re: It used to be

from: whipchick
date: Feb. 22nd, 2013 06:03 pm (UTC)
Link

I will have to check next time I'm there! There's probably a big enough Balkan population to warrant them...

Reply | Parent | Thread