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Mar. 8th, 2014 | 09:04 am

Dear Idol Community:

Thank you for your consideration of my application for participation. Below please find my relevant details and experience.


Height:
Six inches taller than all women in Mumbai and four inches taller than all men.

Weight:
Within the five-pound window between Can Hold Up Acrobatic Partner Without Shaking and Can Get Butt Over Head And Turn Upside Down On The Damn Trapeze.

Hair:
Chic Auburn when it’s on sale, otherwise whatever it says on the box this month.

Eyes:
One closed, one squinting at the phone while answering as many emails as possible before getting out of bed.

Religious Affiliation:
Hit on by Buddhist monk at sacred tree where Buddha attained enlightenment; hit on by Episcopalian priest at funeral of grandmother (mine).

Home:
Kalamazoo, Michigan

Number of Days at Home (2013):
46

Number of Days at Home (2014):
0

Locations So Far This Year:
Nepal, Dubai, Salt Lake City, Florida, Dubai, Florida.

Locations Upcoming:
Memphis, Michigan, Dubai

Work Experience:
Actor, director, professor, fire-eater, aerialist, event manager, writer.

Places I Have Been Where I Was Not Supposed To Be:
On the stage of the musical Chicago in the West End; driving across Bulgaria with two drunk mimes in the backseat; Albania; out in public with a man I’m not related to in the Middle East; my entire first year of college.

Languages In Which I Can Discuss The Weather But Not Talk About God:
Japanese, Czech, Hindi, ASL, Italian, French, Catalan, Albanian, Macedonian, Serbo-Croatian, German (with Austrian accent), Dutch, Afrikaans.

Languages In Which I Can Talk About God:
English, barely.

Number of Relationships Fucked Up Through A Combination Of Bad Behavior And Entitlement:
3

Number of Relationships Where “Bisexual” Meant “He’s Not Out To His Family Yet”:
1

Number of Relationships In Which The Jury Is Still Out:
1

Number of Cats:
3 (non-custodial)

Number of Posts To Green Room Deliberately Intended To Stir Controversy:
I plead the Fifth.


References available on request.

Thank you for your time and consideration,

Allison


_______________________________________________________
whipchick can't believe she let Gary suck her into this again.





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Comments {78}

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blahblahblah, whatever

(no subject)

from: kathrynrose
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 02:18 pm (UTC)
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1. I'll be happy to serve as a reference. :)
2. I must hear the story of the two drunk mimes.
3. Two Drunk Mimes would be an awesome band name.
4. I'm glad you're back. :)

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kecharasmoon

(no subject)

from: kecharasmoon
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 10:42 pm (UTC)
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I think I'd buy a cd simply because it was called that just so I could hear... wait. Hm.

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iwriteflash

(no subject)

from: iwriteflash
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 03:28 pm (UTC)
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My landlady would be so happy if I were at home a total of 46 days ;)
Glad to see you're in :) Good luck and Hi!

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:48 pm (UTC)
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Haha, yeah - I was in India more days than I was home last year! Glad you're here :)

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(no subject)

from: faerie_spark
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 04:31 pm (UTC)
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Yay, you're back. I was surprised when I checked the intros a day or two ago and didn't se yours. :)

You inspire me to write more clearly and with more colour. Glad you're back!

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:49 pm (UTC)
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That is such a lovely compliment, thank you!!!

Glad you're back, too :)

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Didn't want to be

(no subject)

from: anyonesghost
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 05:17 pm (UTC)
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Awesome. :-) Welcome back, and good luck!

(Also, is it wrong that in my mind, the mimes were making out, and my main concern is to wonder how much noise they were making?) ( #dontjudge )

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:49 pm (UTC)
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That makes me laugh and laugh and laugh :)

Glad you're back, too!

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Desiree

(no subject)

from: x_disturbed_x
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 09:33 pm (UTC)
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I am very happy to see you back! :P

Edited at 2014-03-08 09:33 pm (UTC)

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:49 pm (UTC)
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Thanks! Glad you're back, too!

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Jenn

(no subject)

from: kickthehobbit
date: Mar. 8th, 2014 10:22 pm (UTC)
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Yay, you're back! :D

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:49 pm (UTC)
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Yay, so are you!

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heather chick

(no subject)

from: kittenboo
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:09 am (UTC)
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Can't wait to read more from you!

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:49 pm (UTC)
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Thanks - I'm eager to see your work!

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the key of the day and the lock of the night

(no subject)

from: locknkey
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 07:20 am (UTC)
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I like this original take and cute answers to common questions, Good luck, dear. nice to see you again!

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:50 pm (UTC)
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Thanks :) Nice to see you, too!

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Yelеna

(no subject)

from: kehlen_crow
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 12:51 pm (UTC)
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Neat :)

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 03:50 pm (UTC)
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Thanks :)

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shay_writes

(no subject)

from: shay_writes
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 08:09 pm (UTC)
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I enjoyed this and I can't wait to read more.

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 12th, 2014 05:05 pm (UTC)
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Thanks :)

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Ink Well

(no subject)

from: penpusher
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 09:14 pm (UTC)
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It's always good to see more circusfolk around here! Because the way I see it, the freaks rule the world and it's up to us to use those abilities for good and not evil.

Unless the evil is good. and since you are the exception that proves the rule, I'm glad you got coerced into doing this, since I missed out on all the other times.

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 12th, 2014 05:05 pm (UTC)
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So nice to meet you! What did you/do you do, circus-wise?

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Rebecca

(no subject)

from: beeker121
date: Mar. 9th, 2014 11:40 pm (UTC)
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"Two drunk mimes in a backseat" sounds like a title or a punchline or some other truly fabulous thing.

I'm glad you've been sucked back in.

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 12th, 2014 05:06 pm (UTC)
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Thanks, looking forward to it!

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lawchicky

(no subject)

from: lawchicky
date: Mar. 10th, 2014 01:42 pm (UTC)
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Welcome back!!

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 12th, 2014 05:06 pm (UTC)
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Thanks! You, too!

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drwex

Welcome back

from: drwex
date: Mar. 10th, 2014 05:01 pm (UTC)
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I've missed you.

I find I'm interested in the temporal alignment of those relationships and whose side was Entitled.

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whipchick

Re: Welcome back

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 12th, 2014 05:07 pm (UTC)
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Thanks :) I've been taking a break, and then I finished a book, so that was a good break, but it's nice to be back.

Entitled is All Me All The Time. I have previously been terrible at relationships, and I'm finally in one where I'm ready to be in it and it's one I deserve and can strive to be worthy of. Thank goodness!



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The Coalition For Disturbing Metaphors

(no subject)

from: halfshellvenus
date: Mar. 10th, 2014 06:54 pm (UTC)
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:D And here I thought that was your natural hair color!

driving across Bulgaria with two drunk mimes in the backseat;
Oh.My.God. That sounds like something from one of my nightmares. \o/

I'm glad you're back, for as long as you'll have us, and hope to hear from you more in the next few weeks! I've missed you. :)

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whipchick

(no subject)

from: whipchick
date: Mar. 12th, 2014 05:08 pm (UTC)
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I've missed you, too - can't wait to see what you write this time around!

It's the color I was intended to have :) But I'm blonde underneath!

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